Good Morning, World! I hope everyone is having a glorious Wednesday where ever you may be. It is actually raining here in SoCal and I have to say, I just love it! Rainy days make my heart just as happy as any sunny day does…. probably because it only rains 3 days out of the year here!!! But that is neither here nor there!
What I really wanted to talk about today was this amazing epiphany I had on my drive into work today (yes, I’m typing this on my work computer)! It was one of those ah-ha moments when this thing that I was thinking about became so clear to me! And the answer is so, so, so simple it’s almost too easy, like, palm-to-forehead-duh!!! But before I share this epiphany with you, I need to back up first.
I was having a conversation this morning with one of my best friends in the entire world. As we talked, she broke down into tears and poured her heart out to me about how she feels like she is failing at life on a daily basis. She feels like her life is literally out of control. She is married with kids, has a good job, a mortgage, an SUV, and two dogs. Her kids do all the things that kids should be doing. They have everything they need and really…. she knows this. She knows how blessed she is…. But she still feels like she is falling apart.
My friend is not alone. That is the first lesson to be learned here. Every single person bears their own burdens. Burdens that they don’t share with everyone. Burdens that they carry alone, in the dark. Their burdens. Not yours or mine or anyone elses but theirs. And how they choose to carry these burdens is completely up to them. But just know that every single person you encounter, they’re going through something. They have baggage that they are carrying with them and they’re just trying to figure out how to live life with it. Just. Like. You.
Where your focus is, will consume your life. That is lesson number two. If you are so focused on the problems that you have in your life, that is what you will think your life is. One big problem after another. I am guilty of doing this as well, although I have made a concerted effort the past 2 years to always shift my mindset from negative to positive as fast as possible. It’s not easy to do but the more you try, the easier it gets. I’ve been doing it for so long now that it really is a habit to find the positive in every situation and focus on that. I don’t like spending my energy on being negative. That includes anger, bitterness, hurt, sadness, etc, etc. That’s not to say that these emotions never come up. But when they do, I try to be as mindful of my behavior as I can, and bring myself back to a state of love and gratitude as quickly as I can. Not because I think that I am superior to anyone else, but because I like being happy and I want to get back to being happy as fast as possible.
Now, with all of that being said, let me share with you where my epiphany came in. As I am talking with my friend and trying to help her work through these feelings, I said to her, “everyone is failing, no one has it all together.” and her reply through the sobs was, “but I REEEEAAALLLY don’t! I may look like I do, but I don’t!” Shortly after this, our conversation got cut off and we had to go. But as I was driving to work I started to think about her words. And it hit me. We can all agree that instagram is everyone’s highlight reel, right? And we can all agree that when we compare ourselves to other people’s high light reels, we are stealing our own joy, right? We all know this! Well then, why are we still doing it?
Why are we still looking at another person’s high light reel, knowing that they don’t have it all figured out and allowing that to make us feel bad about ourselves? And let me take it a step further; why are we judging other people for only showing their high light reel? We need to stop assuming that because a person only shows the good, they are automatically trying to fake a front. Let me tell you something, I only post the high lights on my social media because those are the things I want to illuminate in my life. I don’t want to feed any negativity by giving it a spot light. It doesn’t mean that I don’t have problems and it doesn’t mean I’m not being real because I don’t share them. It just means that I’m out here trying to stay in a state of love and gratitude and not give attention to any negativity.
So the take aways from all of this and the key to living happily no matter what the circumstances?
Number 1: You are not alone. We all have problems.
Number 2: If you focus on your problems, you will always find problems. If you focus on blessings, you will always find blessings. (I just added that last part :))
Number 3: Stop comparing yourself to other people. We all have problems and we are all just out here winging it.
Number 4: Stop judging other people for what they choose to share with the world and how they choose to deal with their problems. Instead, be understanding that they are dealing with something that we couldn’t possibly understand (even if they are choosing not to share it) because we are not in their shoes.
Love. Gratitude. Understanding. Acceptance. Harmony. We don’t have to agree with each other, think the same, act the same, vote the same, or love the same to respect each other. Please, go out into the world today and love the humans you come in contact with because that is what they deserve.
My heart is full of so much gratitude for every single person that reads this and my prayer is that it will help you in some way. We only have today, right now in this moment to be the kind of people we want to be. The past is gone, and the future is still unwritten. Make the most of today and choose to be more of the person that you want to be…. how would the very best version of yourself live this day out?
Until next time,